Poem of the Day

For varied reasons, Suzanne Vega's Penitent has been playing over and over in my head these last few days. It's a rather cutting query to God, sung in her characteristically insightful and cutting way (it's even more powerful in song than it is as a poem, in cold black words on a page). I particularly like the lines about the mother and matador, which I think add a powerfully timeless element to (what I see as) the personal elements of the song (she wrote it after her divorce and as an NYCer after 9/11). I enjoy the image of mystics and a matadors staring down God in their own ways, one by daring to ponder mysteries greater than themselves and another by facing down death as an occupation (albeit in a ritualized fashion). Anyways, onto our main event:

Once I stood alone so proud
Held myself above the crowd
Now I am low on the ground

From here I look around to see
What avenues belong to me
I can’t tell what I’ve found now

What would you have me do... I ask you please?
I wait to hear

The mother, and the matador
The mystic, each were here before
Like me, to stare

You down you appear without a face
Disappear, but leave your trace
I feel your unseen frown

Now what would you have me do... I ask you please?

I wait to hear/Your voice
The word/You say
I wait/To see/Your sign
Would I/Obey?

I look for you in heathered moor
The desert, and the ocean floor
How low does one heart go

Looking for your fingerprints
I find them in coincidence
And make my faith to grow

Forgive me all my blindnesses
My weakness and unkindnesses
As yet unbending still

Struggling so hard to see
My fist against eternity
And will you break my will?

Now what would you have me do... I ask you please?
I wait to hear/Your voice
The word/You say
I wait/To see/Your sign
Could I/Obey?